Sample Resume for an Attorney Career Change - Critique
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About this Sample Resume Critique
In this sample resume critique, the certified professional resume writer at
ResumeEdge explains
the process of creating the client's "after" resume from the client's "before" resume.
So that you may easily compare them to judge the quality of
ResumeEdge's work,
both the "before" and "after"
sample resumes are linked below. They are also linked from the Sample
Resumes page.
Sample Resume Critique
Dear Monica ~
Given your decision to enter the entertainment industry as a corporate
attorney, I chose Design #11 to best serve your needs. It's well
organized, yet stylish, as befits your career change.
In your contact information, I did not include your fax number.
Rarely, if ever, do hiring managers contact successful applicants
by fax.
In the body of the resume I opted for an Objective in which I
wrote, “Seeking a Corporate Attorney position in the Entertainment
Industry,” followed by a Qualifications section that indicates
what skills you have to fulfill this career change.
In the Qualifications summary I described you as proactive and
articulate, then listed where you are licensed to practice, including
your eligibility for membership in the District of Columbia Bar.
(Since hiring managers rarely read entire resumes, it's best to
get this information in as quickly as possible). I then wrote of
your co-founding a Connecticut law firm and your specializations
in employment litigation and criminal proceedings. I ended this
brief paragraph with your additional capabilities in legal research.
For the next section, I changed “Professional Experience” to “Legal
Experience” in order to further interest a hiring manager.
In this section, I began each bulleted sentence with the strongest
action verb possible, while also revising text for clarity, conciseness,
and maximum impact.
For example, you wrote:
“Represented court appointed indigent clients in all phases
of criminal proceedings from probable cause hearings, competency
evaluations, plea negotiations through trial.”
I revised that to read:
“Vigorously defended clients in all phases of criminal proceedings
that included probable cause hearings, competency evaluations,
plea negotiations, and trials.”
In another example, you wrote:
“Represented plaintiffs in all phases of employment litigation
in The United States District Court for Connecticut and in mediations
before The Equal Employment Opportunity Commission.”
I revised that to read:
“Specialized in all phases of employment litigation practicing
before the US District Court for Connecticut; mediated cases before
the EEOC (Equal Employment Opportunity Commission).”
Because of space considerations (the industry standard for a resume
is one page except for senior executives with decades of experience)
and relevancy issues, I did not include your LPN or Adjunct Professor
jobs.
I ended your resume with the Education and Affiliations sections.
All decisions to modify data were in keeping with the guidelines
and standards set forth by the Professional Association of Resume
Writers (PARW). With this resume, you now have a powerful tool
that's well organized and filled with pertinent data, while also
being aesthetically pleasing.
It was a pleasure serving you, Monica. Best of luck in all your
future endeavors.
ResumeEdge Editor
Certified Professional
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